On being green.

Offline, we've been discussing the difference between envy and jealousy. Turns out, I think the discussion helps clarify what the two things are. Here's a sum-up; but, note: this is clean slate, and does not extend the definitional discussion below. Also, I am being descriptive, and not prescriptive, of what these terms mean. Finally, I am agreeing with Mike's comments (below) that these are bad things--and so am explaining why they are bad.

Ordinary language tends to conflate envy and jealousy. The philosophical consensus is that these are distinct emotions.

To sum up the discussion in this link, jealousy is focused on the goal; envy is focused on the competitor. Both are three-place relations.

Jealousy involves three parties, the subject, the rival, and the beloved; and the jealous person's real locus of concern is the beloved—the person whose affection he is losing or fears losing—not his rival. Whereas envy is a two party relation, with a third relatum that is a good (albeit a good that could be a particular person's affections); and the envious person's locus of concern is the rival.

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Because envy is centrally focused on competition with the rival, the subject might well be equally bothered if the rival were consorting with a different (appealing) person, but would not be bothered if the ‘good’ had gone to someone else (with whom the subject was not in competition).

An aside on envy: Stemming off this, I would call an aspect of envy the “kid and fire truck toy” theory. Kid A ignores a lonely, plastic fire truck. Kid B goes to the toy and has a field day rolling it across the play room carpet. Kid A becomes instantly interested in the red plastic toy and tries to edge Kid B away, fails, and then cries to Babysitter X “make Kid B (these kids speak in abstract language too) give me the truck!” Somewhere in the midst of Babysitter X’s lecture on the value of sharing, Kid B has moved to another toy, Kid A has grabbed the truck, and immediately lost interest in the once-valued commodity.

Here, envy is manifested in Kid B’s propensity to act as a driver to Kid A’s wants. Kid A and Kid B are “rivals” for purposes of this discussion; they are peers with common stations in life and presumed aspirations (seeking out the enjoyable passage of time within a playroom). Obviously lacking in his ability to find fun, Kid A is envious of Kid B’s seeming amusement, and is led to one potential result of envy: copycat-itude.

In any event, let’s return to envy/jealousy in respect to relationships. Strike that. It is helpful to divide out relationship and pre-relationship (crush, flirt, moonlight walks…) because, as we should see, the crucial aspect the reasonableness plays in all this changes with the status of relationship.

Starting with the abstract: simply wanting to be in a relationship is neither jealousy nor envy. Narrowing in, say you see a happy couple. Wanting a relationship like that (so you say to yourself) is likewise neither envy nor jealousy…it is rather a reasonable aspiration. Even coming upon a specific person with whom you wish you were calling “darling” is not necessarily jealousy.

In this situation, jealousy is the unreasonable attachment of emotion upon the desire for that “good.” Various indicators reveal the unreasonableness. It might be the 13 year old that really really wants to be married to the unknown celebrity; it could be the fault of emitting onto a person what we want them to be, and not who they are; it could be our desire for what we want trumping the more reasonable desires for what is good.

Envy, here, is the unreasonable attachment of enmity toward the competitor to this goal (the “goal” here being the crushee. Note: this clearly objectifies the person, and that’s really the point, isn’t it? Jealousy and envy, in their unreasonableness, tend to have that effect.) We would be envious of the guy we see the girl flirting with. Again, though, it isn’t automatically envy to take notice of competition; rather, envy comes at the point that said notice becomes unreasonable emotion (ill-will, for instance). It is also possible to be envious of the barriers to having the relationship (the goal). One might be envious of the crushee’s personal or career aspirations (I think). Envy is that angry eye turning to the obstacle. It is the tripped up runner yelling at the hurdle.

We see here, too, that jealousy and envy can (and, likely usually do) co-exist…spurned on by one-another.

In all this, the basic concept of agape (brotherly love…the “highest” love in most Greek literature) is in many ways is the active refusal of jealousy and envy.